5 Tips for Raising Teens Effectively (Guest: Peggy Caruso)

BTAboutThemFinding it difficult to raise your teenage children? Adopt Peggy Caruso’s five life-saver tips to give them the right direction.

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peggy1. SET GOALS
Setting and reaching goals is very important with teenagers. Goals help them define what is important and it teaches them how to prioritize. It assists them with developing a plan of action in which they can measure their progress. Goals assist with maintaining focus, overcoming obstacles and staying positive.

Set short- and long-term goals. Once they reach a short-term goal it will be a motivator to work toward a bigger and more challenging goal. It will make them persistent in their endeavors.

In goal-setting, you must discover your child’s skill sets. Skills are behaviors in which we increase our knowledge, and abilities are natural talents. Understanding what skills and abilities they have and what they need to reach their dreams is an important component in your child’s career development.

Your teenager will develop skills that will be transferred as an adult. You will begin to understand their personality, discover their creativity and it will be easier to encourage them to become involved in extra-curricular activities. Remember that the less idle time they have, the better.

All successful people set personal and professional goals and it is very influential in raising a teenager’s self-esteem. It provides them with direction and a sense of accomplishment.

2. TEACH MASTERMINDING
Social media has a major impact on a teenager’s ability to effectively communicate. Verbal communication is on a decline due to texting.

One area to enhance communication is to teach masterminding. This is very effective and utilized by many adults; therefore, it can be effectively implemented with teenagers.

It is placing a group of five or six like-minded teens together to meet once biweekly for one hour. Meeting places can vary between houses. They begin by each taking one minute to say their “win for the week” and then they move on to challenges. Each teen presents a challenge they are facing and the remainder of the group assists by providing feedback and solutions.

This assists with problem solving and holding one another accountable. It reinforces communication and interpersonal relations. Masterminding enhances friendships, and helps them balance the highs and lows. It assists with creativity and establishes motivation and persistence. Communication is the key to every relationship.

PCarusocover3. TEACH PERSISTENCE
Teaching them to be persistent requires that they will be definite in their decisions, and that requires courage. It is a state of mind; therefore, it can be cultivated and with persistence comes success. When we talk of success, most people think of adults. But if you begin applying the success principles when your children are young and impressionable, you teach them how to realize that failure is good sometimes.

Persistent action comes from persistent vision. When you define your goal and your vision remains exact, you will be more consistent and persistent in your actions. That consistent action will produce consistent results.

Remember to teach your child the difference between the person who fails and the one who succeeds is the perception they have. It is seizing an opportunity and acting upon it, unlike the person who allows fear to dominate his abilities.

4. SET BOUNDARIES
It is extremely important to give teenagers consequences. They must understand poor choices and what happens when rules are broken. Once you set a consequence, it is imperative that you follow through. Once the teenager overpowers the parent, the problems spin out of control. You need to ensure that you, as the parent, are the one who maintains control.

Set boundaries and learn to say “no.” Don’t allow them too much “alone” time. Teens who spend an excessive amount of time alone in their room can get into trouble on the Internet. Keep electronics away from the dinner table and out of their room while they sleep.

5. IMPLEMENT SUCCESS PRINCIPLES
In today’s society, teenagers are faced with many negative influences, such as bullying, social media, Internet, divorce, cutting, depression and many others. Once it is determined what the issues are and where they were developed, a positive intervention can be applied.

One great positive intervention is implementing success principles. Discovering the true talents and abilities within our children will prepare them for this unpredictable world by teaching them how to adapt to any situation. Instilling entrepreneurial ideas in children will help them become successful adults and it will create independence within them.

Once your child becomes a teenager, you can get them into the financial mindset associated with college. Use a net price calculator on college websites to see how much each year costs when including other expenses besides tuition. Instead of letting them think you will pay for their college, allow them to understand the associated costs.

Also explain how there are other ways to assist, such as financial aid, grants and scholarships, and the differences in what needs to be paid back and what is free money. Teaching the fundamental principles at an early age will make them aware of why they need to focus on getting good grades and how their GPA affects the financial status regarding college.

Understanding finance will also help them understand how student loan debt could affect their lifestyle after graduation. This will make them aware of the importance of good spending habits during their college years. Children who help repay their college debt learn to be grateful and conscientious about money. Studies have shown that when children pay a portion of their debt, they are generally more focused on their academic performance.

They need to learn how to manage their own strengths and weaknesses. Many children are afraid to fail because they feel that they are letting their parents down. Teach them that failure is just feedback, letting you know how to modify your plan. It is a stepping stone to success. Many of the successful people in history have had multiple failures before reaching success.

As children and teens grow, they need to learn how to deal with change. We can’t give our children a blueprint in life, but we can teach them coping skills. Your child’s skills and abilities will be their most valuable asset throughout their lives.

Once you discover what their true talents and passions are, it is easy to get them started on building a business. There are many businesses suitable for children and teens. Educating them about employment or entrepreneurship has astounding effects. It teaches them time management, assists them in learning how to follow directions, and provides team and leadership skills. Studies show discouraged teens often grow up to become discouraged adults. This affects their confidence level in the workforce.

Peggy Caruso can be reached at pcaruso@lifecoaching.comcastbiz.net for more information. www.lifecoachingandbeyond.com

 

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