Tag Archives: children and divorce

Back to School After Divorce: Tips to Help Your Kids! (Rosalind Sedacca, CDC)

BTSpReportReturning to school after a summer break marked by the divorce of the parents would be a challenge for any youngster. Rosalind Sedacca, founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network, offers some great tips to help these kids make the best of the support available at school. We present, “Back to School After Divorce: Tips to Help Your Kids!”

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Back to school after divorce, tips to help your kids, rosalind sedaccaMany divorces take place during the summer. This timing can help families adapt to the changes ahead. But it also makes returning to school a challenge for most children. Fortunately, there are ways to ease the transition by tapping into the many resources available through the school. That’s why it’s wise to develop a cooperative relationship with key school personnel.

Communicate with the School

Start by informing your child’s teachers about the divorce and any changes in your home environment. The more aware they are, the better prepared they can be to help your child. After all, school is often a second home for children – and that may be very comforting during this time of transition.

We can’t expect children to not be affected by the divorce. So expect raw emotions to come to the surface, including fear, shame, guilt and many forms of insecurity. Be aware that these complex feelings are likely to affect a child’s focus and self-esteem, as well as relationships with their friends – not to mention the impact on their academic performance.

Take advantage of the fact that most children trust and feel safe with their teachers. So schedule a conversation with them before the school year starts. Discuss the status of your post-divorce arrangements. Having the teacher as an ally can help your child feel more secure and less alone.

Child-Centered Divorce Network, Rosalind SedaccaUtilize the School’s Resources

The following suggestions can guide parents in using school system resources to your child’s advantage:

Teachers can look for signs of distress or depression in your child. Being compassionate by nature, teachers can talk with your child about their feelings. They can let your child know they are not the blame. Nor are they the only kids at school going through these difficulties. Messages like this can reinforce prior conversations you’ve already had with your child. It also reassures them to know that the divorce is not a big dark secret. It can be discussed candidly without shame.

Talk with your child’s guidance counselor. These professionals are a valuable resource; they are trained to handle challenging circumstances. They can be an ally to you and your children, and they can be counted on for support and guidance.

Look at these educators as members of your child’s support team. They have the background to detect signs of depression, aggression or other behavior changes that need to be addressed with you as soon as possible. So ask them to be attentive toward your child.

Be sure to take advantage of divorce support groups at school. These groups are designed to encourage children to talk with one another, sharing their feelings during or after the divorce. It’s helpful to know they’re not alone, that they’re accepted, and that others are facing or have experienced similar life-altering circumstances. That awareness gives children a sense of belonging. Many children make new friends with others who are sharing their experiences. The less alone a child feels, the easier it is to accept the challenges they will be facing in the weeks and months to come.

Of course, schools cannot replace parental responsibilities. It’s essential to talk to your child before they return to school. Prepare them for changes in routine or scheduling they might encounter. Inform them about those they can talk to at school if they are feeling sad or have questions about adjusting to new situations.

Let school be your child’s best friend at this time. It can be a great support system for your family if you take advantage of the experience and useful resources available. ###

Speakers Group MemberRosalind Sedacca, CDC is a Divorce & Parenting Coach, founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network and author of How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children — with Love! For Rosalind’s free ebook on Post-Divorce Parenting, coaching services, articles and other valuable resources on divorce and parenting issues, go to: www.childcentereddivorce.com.

 

January is International Child-Centered Divorce Month (Guest: Rosalind Sedacca)

RSedaccaPhotoJanuary is International Child-Centered Divorce Month. Through the tireless efforts of Rosalind Sedacca, the Voice of Child-Centered Divorce, emphasis in addressing the needs of children in the context of divorce is growing in priority and practice worldwide. More and more, divorce attorneys, mediators, coaches, financial planners, educators and therapists are integrating child-centered principles and are more than pleased with the results.

Intl Child-Centered Divorce Month logo - newListen as Rosalind shares the story of her own divorce as she explains how and why she chose a child-centered approach, and how these early efforts grew into her work today as a Divorce and Parenting Coach and founder of The Child-Centered Divorc Network. And, of course, Rosalind will share the many (FREE) opportunities and resources being offered to parents world-wide during International Child-Centered Divorce Month.

Rosalind is a contributing expert, author and guest blogger on the topic of child-centered divorce, and she is the author of the internationally acclaimed, innovative and creative ebook, How Do I Tell the Kids About the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook Guide to Preparing Your Children–with Love. (25:44)

www.divorcedparentsupport.com/ebook

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What is the Truth About the Impact of Divorce on Children? (Guest: Lesli Doares)

Although divorce is hardly a unique circumstance in society today, it’s a safe bet that many youngsters feel uniquely affected by divorce when it happens in their own lives and families. And, in many ways, they’re right.

How are they supposed to feel? What are they supposed to do? They don’t know, so they look to us for help.

Lesli Doares, the guest on this program, offers insights, ideas and interventions that can help. She has a firm, personal perspective on a child’s view of divorce, and she suggests ways of telling children about the divorce of their parents. Lesli then goes on to discuss normal reactions to divorce, and how we can best help children and teens through the process. She also tells listeners what behaviors to look for when youngsters become “stuck” and might benefit from professional help. Bottom line: When parents work to manage a good divorce, everyone benefits. It’s worth every bit of the effort.

Lesli maintains a practice as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in North Carolina. In addition to her work as a therapist, she’s a popular speaker and workshop leader on the topic of building strong marriages. Lesli’s the author of A Blueprint for a Lasting Marriage: How to Create Your Happily Ever After with More Intention, Less Work.  Her website is: www.afearlessmarriage.com. (27:47)

 

TO LISTEN, use the player below or left-click the link. To access the file right-click and “Save Target as …” to save to your audio device), CLICK HERE FOR LINK