I asked Christy if she would share this story as a special tribute to Mother’s Day. I first read this story about her grandmother, Nana, in her book, Family Talk. (That’s Nana with the much-younger-at-the-time Monson children in the photograph below Christy’s picture.) –JDS
As mothers we have significant influence in our families. Many times we give gifts of light and love to our families that we don’t even notice. As we bless the lives of others, we find that we are strengthened also. I have found this to be true, especially when problems arise. There are always situations that don’t run as smoothly as we would like or unexpected circumstances that disrupt our plans and even our lives.
A Priceless Legacy
My ninety-nine-year-old grandmother, Nana, lived in our home. We loved and enjoyed her. All of our children took part in her care. They helped with her meals, played games with her, read to her, and rolled her wheel chair outside into the sunshine so she could watch them play soccer. When problems arose, we sat down as a family to decide how we would handle the difficulty.
Nana always liked to be busy, so the kids came up with the idea of giving her the clean socks to match. That was a wonderful idea, and it kept her occupied for long periods of time. She left us the priceless legacy of not only being part of the group, but also being a contributing member of the family right up to the time she died.
One afternoon I went into her bedroom to see if Nana had awakened from her nap, and I found that she had passed away. Shock and disbelief wafted over me. I spent a few minutes sitting in the living room, pulling myself together before the children came home from school. What was I going to do? How would I handle the situation?
After everyone had arrived home, we sat together as a family, and I told the children Nana was gone. They were all grief-stricken. Each of the children expressed their feelings differently. Some wanted to go into the bed room and say good-bye to her. Others decided to remember her when she was alive. We all cried and shared memories.
After sharing our initial grief, we talked about the things we had to do—the coroner, funeral arrangements, and notifying relatives. Everyone took an assignment and pitched in to help. By the time I went to bed that night, everything was arranged, and I felt peaceful. There was an added spirit of love in our home that everyone could feel.
Shared Experiences; Life-long Memories
It’s now been quite a few years since Nana died, but whenever we refer to it, all of our children have significant impressions of that day and time. It’s indelibly fixed in our memories as a spiritual, soul-expanding experience that has made us all stronger individuals.
Look at your own family. Find the times where you have given gifts of love, listening, and sharing of feelings that have made a difference in your lives. See where you have created that synergy with the generations past and the generations of the future. The world is a better place for your goodness.
We honor you on this happy Mother’s Day. ###
Visit Christy’s website [link] for more information on her books, free downloads on helping children through divorce, death and tragedy, and other pertinent information for helping children become the best the can be.
To access Christy’s radio-style interviews and articles on The Changing Behavior Network, use the search box on the right, entering “Christy Monson.”